SCRIPT & LAYOUTS - GO TO: ROUGHS & FINISHES
Title: Loner
Script: Tim Daniel
Art: Ming Doyle


Nutshell: A young girl’s first day at a new middle school turns into anything but the typical outsider’s nightmare.

Character Descriptions

Loner:
1940’s style attire; knee length dress, dots or floral print on white/light colored cloth.
Moderately curly red hair above shoulders. Hair band or bow/band pulling hair from face.
White Cardigan sweater buttoned at neck line. Extremely pale complexion, icy blue/grey eyes.

Goth Girl:
Black shirt, ankle-length shorts, black leather belt, metal studding. Long black hair with streaks of red highlights – length well past shoulders, straight with extreme bangs. Dark make-up underneath eyes. Splashes of red all over her wardrobe, wrist bands, arm sleeves, shoe laces.

Page 1 Panel 1: - Wide all the way across the page. Establishing shot. - Exterior Middle School. Our point of view is ground level so that we’re looking upshot at a large imposing building - all brick and glass, the smooth paved walkway lined with rows of flowering hedges and mature trees arching overhead. As it is fall, the first day of school, leaves stream down from overheard. Above the double windowed doors engraved on the arch, PAXSON. Panel 2: - Wide all the way across the page. Establishing shot. - Interior Middle School, same POV as first panel, looking up from ground level down the long hallway, a canyon of lockers ending in the same double glass doors we’ve seen from the outside only the doors are obscured by a blinding light source.

Page 2 Panel 1: - Small panel, half width of page. Tight close up - hand of clock striking 8:30am Panel 2: Small panel, half width of page. Tight close up - hammer ringing school bell. Panel 3: Medium panel all the way across the page. Hallway, doors bursting open. Panel 4: Largest panel of the page, wide shot, all the way across the page. Bedlam in the hallway, a torrent of children of all shapes, sizes, dress and manner cascading down towards us.

Page 3 Panel 1: Medium panel all the way across the page. The flood of school children is over. Down at the end of the hallway, our loner stands just inside the doors, head bowed gazing at her feet obscuring our view of her face. Her posture is rigid, her hands intertwined nervously. She wears a "Hello My Name is" sticker/name tag. The space where the children pen their names is blank. There are no shoes on her feet, maybe the reason for her demeanor, possibly a first hint that she just might be different. Narration: [How often do you find yourself alone in a crowd?] Panel 2: Giant panel, ¾, filling remainder of page. Medium close up of loner, revealing her from the waist up. She has raised her head and stares piercingly right at us, her expression a mixture of fear and loneliness. Narration: [In a strange place. Yanked from your world. Thrust into another, beyond your control.]

Page 4 Panel 1: Medium panel all the way across the page. Loner stands on the left hand side of the panel in the same locked posture, though her expression is one of hope as a group of young girls walk towards her from the right hand side of the frame. Their expressions are one of obvious excitement and girlish glee, they are each dressed similarly in blacks, reds, a mixture of pop-goth punk. Narration: [You don’t fit in.] Panel 2: Medium panel all the way across the page. A third figure has entered the panel on the left hand side. She is Goth Girl, the leader of the pack, and this is her entourage rushing to greet her. The group is half way across the panel, centered in the frame. The loner, taller than the rest of the group, and dressed in such a contrasting style amidst the blacks and reds, stands out in the center of group as they pass right through/by her. Narration: [And you can’t get out.] Panel 3: Medium panel all the way across the page. Goth Girl is embraced by the group on the extreme left-hand side of the panel as loner looks forlornly back with a 3/4 profile turn from the right-hand side of the frame. Narration: [You can see them. But they look right through you.] Panel 4: Smaller panel, half way across page. Close-up on Goth Girl. Tight on her eyes, she's in the foreground of the frame while in the background, framing the left-hand side of her face is the entourage. Several visible faces still smiling at the sight of their leader. Narration: [You can be in their world.] Panel 5: Smaller panel, half way across page. Close-up on Goth Girl. Tight on her eyes, her brow is now heavily furrowed, her eyes drawn in tight suspicious slits. Does she despise the sight of this new girl, the loner, or what exactly does she see? Goth Girl’s in the foreground of the frame while in the background, framing the left-hand side of her face is the entourage. Several visible faces giving us a puzzled look. Their leader's strange behavior confuses them. Panel 6: This panel is un-bordered and fills the remaining half right-hand side of the page. Loner stands head bowed in obvious disappointment. She is the very embodiment of and outsider, the borderless panel underscoring her solitude. Her body is fading, partially invisible, as if she is receding into a haze, or fog, or simply immaterial. Narration: [But you’ll never be a part of their world.]

Page 5 Top of page: Narration: [And if you're lucky enough, to find someone to talk with-] Panel 1: Medium panel, half way across the page. Medium shot, head and shoulders of two students, one male (slightly taller), one female (our Goth Girl), are walking down the hallway towards us, close together. They are laughing, enjoying the comfort of each other’s familiar company. The male is typical emo-goth/ a mishmash of pop and punk attire down to the faux-hawk hair style. Panel 2: Medium panel, half way across the page. Medium shot, head and shoulders same student couple, one male (slightly taller), one female (our Goth Girl), are walking down the hallway towards us, slightly closer than the previous panel, so the frame is tighter upon them. Goth Girl rests her head upon the male student’s shoulder in quite affection. Narration: [To share a smile or laugh with.] Panel 3: Small panel, one-third page width. Close up, two hands dangling a few short inches apart. A ring on one finger on the right-hand in the frame. Narration: [A secret] Panel 4: Small panel, one-third page width. Close up, two hands dangling, the fingers searching out the other hand, close enough to touch finger tips. The ring slips free from the finger on the right-hand in the frame. Narration: [moment] Panel 5: Small panel, one-third page width. Close up, two hands clasped, the ring free in the air below the hands, dropping unseen to the floor. Narration: [or memory,] Panel 6: Medium panel all the way across the page. Close up of the ring dropping through the air, pinging off the polished checker floor, in a series of diminishing bounces, rolling off the edge of the frame to the right.

Page 6 Panel 1: Medium panel all the way across the page. Medium shot, the ring has rolled all the way across the panel to the right of the frame where it rests at the edge of a set of ghostly pale feet. Panel 2: Medium panel, one-half page width. Close up of hand reaching for the ring which is off frame. Panel 3: Medium panel, one-half page width. Close up of the hand visibly trembling at Goth Girl’s recognition of the ghostly pale feet, the ring no longer there on the floor. Panel 4: Large panel, filling the remaining two-thirds of the page. ¾ shot of Goth Girl in the background, on bended knee, her face a rigid mask of abject horror at the site that stands before her. Our loner is on the right of the frame, in the foreground, close enough to us so that our view is obscured by the angle (we’re beside her, almost over her shoulder). Little more than her profile is visible to us. She is awash in blue luminescence, her clothes drifting free of her body in shreds and tatters, floating, spectral tendrils of energy pluck at the air all around her (think Poltergeist). Her hair is a medusa’s tangle of snake like appendages, each with a mind of their own. Her right arm is outstretched and the ring rests in her open palm. Narration: [don’t let that chance slip through your fingers.]

Page 7 Panel 1: Medium panel all the way across the page (slightly larger than those to follow). Medium shot, the ring passes through the loner’s ghostly transparent hand dropping into the open palm of Goth Girl. Panel 2: Medium panel all the way across the page. Medium shot, the loner is closest to us with her back turned to the camera. She is slightly right of center in the frame and still alight with the spectral energy, drifting away from us down the hall past the horrified boyfriend who stands in the background, left of center. Panel 3: Medium panel all the way across the page. Medium shot, though our camera is pulling back as the loner continues to drift away from us down the hall past the horrified boyfriend who stands in the background, left of center. Each figure is visibly smaller than the prior shot though more of each figure appears in the frame. On the far right of the frame we stare straight into the Goth Girl’s right eye in extreme close up. Her make-up slightly smudged with wetness, her expression a mixture of fright and pity. Panel 4: Medium panel all the way across the page. Long shot, as camera continues to pull back and the loner continues to recede from view down the hall past the horrified boyfriend who stands now in the middle-ground, left of center. Each figure is visibly smaller than the prior shots and as such more of each figure appears in the frame. Loner is rippling with the blue energy, though it is obviously diminished in radiance. Her body hovers off the ground, her arms extended outward from her sides. On the extreme right of the frame, Goth Girl has spun in place, her back now to us, her arm extended in a silent plea.

Page 8 Panel 1: - Wide all the way across the page. Interior Middle School, looking up from ground level down the long hallway, a canyon of lockers ending in double glass doors obscured by a blinding light source. In the center of this collapsing envelope of light the loner is fading from view. She is facing us now, restored to her former child form, head solemnly bowed, hands nervously intertwined at her waist, a small hint of a smile tugs at the corner of her lips. SFX: {SCHOOL BELL RINGING} Panel 2: - Wide all the way across the page. Establishing shot. - Exterior Middle School. Our point of view is ground level so that we’re looking upshot at a large imposing building - all brick and glass, the smooth paved walkway lined with rows of flowering hedges and mature trees arching overhead. As it is fall, leaves stream down from overheard. Above the double windowed doors engraved on the arch, PAXSON. The doors have burst wide and a torrent of children comes flooding at us.